Birmingham City - The Wit of Witton Episode 2
UK time is: 07:42:43
Vital Login
Social Login

Choose your club

Other Sites

Network Navigation

Vital Partners

'If It's Football, It's Vital'

The Wit of Witton Episode 2



Ivor Holte-Ende has a girlfriend called Eli Sout and share a house in Worcester. They have a child, which as they aren’t married technically is a bastard. This is why fans of VII-La tend not to bother with marriage. Even if Ivor and Eli were married the status of their children would remain the same.

Ivor and Eli decided to name their child after the Team of 1982 who if you remember beat a couple of Icelandic teams, rioted in Belgium and then fluked a win against Bayern Munich to win the European equivalent of the Leyland Daf. . (UEFA have changed the criteria for entry to Europe now so that no team of deadbeats can win it again.) Their offspring was called Spink , Thingamy, and Nine other Jammy Bastards.

They chose this name because they forget that Spink was not actually in the starting eleven and no-one can remember the right back and the rest speaks for itself.

So Ivor, Elli and Jammy (they pronounce it Jay-me) went off to the Hall of Memory to watch the mighty VII-La. It was to celebrate Eli’s birthday so they got seats in Doug Ellis Other Stand. Not only did her hero’s manage a draw but all the fans stood up and held up cards with her name on. She was thrilled and Ivor knew they were the best fans ever!




Use your social login to comment on front page articles. Login using you Facebook, Twitter, Google or LinkedIn accounts and have your say!


Click here to join in the debate on the club forum.

The Journalist

Writer:  Mail feedback, articles or suggestions

Date:Tuesday May 16 2006

Time: 7:28PM

Your Comments (oldest first)

Change to most recent first
This was inspired by the cruel stick that I have been given by vile fans. I thought that relegation was hard enough but Ivor and Elli are making my life unbearable . I just had to share the burden.
BigAl
Report Abuse
16/05/2006 19:53:00

Yup, articles like this don't make you sound bitter and/or sad at all.
Affers
Report Abuse
16/05/2006 20:01:00

A good attempt at irony, although humour sometimes help get the point across. ;)
FEn_100
Report Abuse
20/05/2006 15:13:00

 

Have Your Say

Log in...
with your social network     OR     with your Vital account

Recent Birmingham City Articles

Two more added to international list (Wednesday September 2 2015)

Why Are We Unbeaten? (Tuesday September 1 2015)

How to Sign Demarai Gray (Monday August 31 2015)

Opinion: Player of the Month (Sunday August 30 2015)

Rowett: Got to Keep Going (Sunday August 30 2015)

Archived Birmingham City Articles

List All Vital Birmingham Articles
Have your say
Click here to suggest an article
Click here to suggest a poll
ScoopDragon Publishing Entire League Network of Sites

League Table (view table)

Team P W D L GD Pts
4. Q.P.R. 5 3 1 1 2 10
5. Cardiff 5 2 3 0 3 9
6. Middlesbrough 5 2 2 1 4 8
7. Birmingham 4 2 2 0 3 8
8. Charlton 5 2 2 1 2 8
9. Burnley 5 2 2 1 0 8
10. Leeds Utd 5 1 4 0 1 7

Birmingham City Fixtures (view all)

Breaking League News

LUFC On This Day - September 3rd
» Leeds Utd : 03/09/2015 07:07:01
LUFC Leeds United Summer Transfer Rumours Round-Up
» Leeds Utd : 02/09/2015 20:08:01
LUFC Ajose leaves Leeds to join Swindon
» Leeds Utd : 02/09/2015 19:54:01
Al Hasawi Hoping For Four More?
» Forest : 02/09/2015 18:16:00
Jutkiewicz Suffers Cruciate Injury
» Burnley : 02/09/2015 17:49:00

Current Site Poll (view all polls)

Birmingham City v Bristol City (Championship)
Suggested By:  
Home win 92%
Draw 4%
Away win 4%