Vital Football

Latest Birmingham City News

The Wit of Witton Episode 2

The Wit of Witton Episode 2



Ivor Holte-Ende has a girlfriend called Eli Sout and share a house in Worcester. They have a child, which as they aren’t married technically is a bastard. This is why fans of VII-La tend not to bother with marriage. Even if Ivor and Eli were married the status of their children would remain the same.

Ivor and Eli decided to name their child after the Team of 1982 who if you remember beat a couple of Icelandic teams, rioted in Belgium and then fluked a win against Bayern Munich to win the European equivalent of the Leyland Daf. . (UEFA have changed the criteria for entry to Europe now so that no team of deadbeats can win it again.) Their offspring was called Spink , Thingamy, and Nine other Jammy Bastards.

They chose this name because they forget that Spink was not actually in the starting eleven and no-one can remember the right back and the rest speaks for itself.

So Ivor, Elli and Jammy (they pronounce it Jay-me) went off to the Hall of Memory to watch the mighty VII-La. It was to celebrate Eli’s birthday so they got seats in Doug Ellis Other Stand. Not only did her hero’s manage a draw but all the fans stood up and held up cards with her name on. She was thrilled and Ivor knew they were the best fans ever!


Click here to join in the debate on the club forum.

Writer:
Date:Tuesday May 16 2006
Time: 7:28PM

Comments

0
This was inspired by the cruel stick that I have been given by vile fans. I thought that relegation was hard enough but Ivor and Elli are making my life unbearable . I just had to share the burden.
BigAl
16/05/2006 19:53:00
0
Yup, articles like this don't make you sound bitter and/or sad at all.
Affers
16/05/2006 20:01:00
0
A good attempt at irony, although humour sometimes help get the point across. ;)
FEn_100
20/05/2006 15:13:00
Page 1/1
  1. 1

Login to post a comment

Best of International Football News

Recent Birmingham City Articles

Blues Tyken to the cleaners

Rob Wildey reacts to Blues' defeat to Barnsley yesterday

Instant Reactions - Birmingham v Barnsley (24/2/18)

Following today's clash between Birmingham City and Barnsley, here are the instant reactions from both managers.

Stats: Birmingham City v Barnsley

All the stats from Birmingham City (0) vs (2) Barnsley, St Andrew's, 24/2/18 Att: 19,822

Birmingham v Barnsley - Team Sheets - 24-2-18

Birmingham are at St Andrew's with Barnsley the visitors for the latest Championship game.

Birmingham City Archived Articles

Vital Birmingham articles from

Site Journalists

Tom Heslop
Editor email
Profile
Christopher Handy
no email
Profile
Saskia Bowes
no email
Profile
Rob Wildey
no email
Profile
Luke Turner
no email
Profile

Current Poll (see more polls)

Barnsley MotM
Suggested By: Site Staff
Stockdale0%
Jenkinson0%
Roberts0%
Dean0%
Colin100%
Ndoye0%
Gardner0%
Boga0%
Maghoma0%
Adams0%
Gallagher0%
Sub - Jota0%
Sub - Bramall0%
ScoopDragon Publishing Entire League Network of Sites
Write for Vital Football
Latest F1 News
Latest Vital Boxing News
The Vital Football Members League

Recent Birmingham City Results (view all)

Birmingham City Fixtures

Vital Members League Table

RankNamePoints
1.Ohio37
2.Bluesince198030
3.David Village29
4.Rob Wildey110
5.greatsince684
6.WayCoolBlue3
7.WhoRya2
8.pippy992
9.Ben23BCFC2
10.Zulublue1
Vital Football Comment